I used to cry as I watched my husband go off to work in the mornings. I loved him so much and could hardly bear to part with him until lunch when he would come home for his midday break. Yes, as a young bride I was lonely without him.
I thought of him throughout the day. Oh, won’t Steven love this! I think I will do this for Steven…How long until he is home? I think I will surprise him with his favorite dessert.
I would listen as he talked and if he gave ANY hint of what he liked or disliked I made note of it to remember. I made it a point to learn every detail of that man that I loved so much! If he so much as hinted at something that he enjoyed, I saved it away in my mind’s eye.
20 years have gone by since those early days of marriage. I don’t cry when he leaves anymore. But, I do yearn and long for him when he is away. Everything is A-OK when he is home.
One thing I have noticed though. We have 8 children now…18 down to 3 and life is sooo busy even on a quiet day. The days are long gone of wondering how I am going to fill my time. Keeping the house in tiptop shape and filling the days with extra tidbits of productivity is a thing of the past. No, now time flies faster than we can blink, and the days become weeks and months before we know it.
And so, in the busyness, in the flying days, in the duties and responsibilities of a large family…it’s easy to forget. It’s easy for me to forget to focus on Steven. It’s easy for me to not think of him as much through the day. It’s easy for my eyes to be on everything else, the children, the home, the schooling, the laundry…but to forget to make sure I am delighting my husband. I need to remember those little (and big things) he loves. I need to remember that when the children leave — we are together until death. We have a lifetime bond that is the most important earthly relationship there is. So, I need to remember to stop and focus…on him.
To remember his favorite dish again, to remember the spot he loves for me to rub on his back, to remember to focus on what is special to him….like it used to be 20 years ago. And in doing so I am pleasing the Lord who made me a help meet for him. Did you know that word help meet means “help suitable”. I and I alone am suitable to be my man’s helper. So, I am thankful for the reminder I have had of that lately to reshift my thoughts once again to serving and loving the man God has given me. For in serving him I am serving the Lord!
What are some things that your husband delights in that you could focus on this week?