A short tutorial:
- Drive your 15 passenger van to the nearest McDonalds and park your van far enough away from the car next to you, so you don’t hit it when you open the door.
- Walk in, all 8 of you, aware that the moment you step inside you will become the center of attention.
- Make a beeline for the play area and note that it is summer vacation now so it is a different story than mid-schoolyear.
- Tell the younger ones they can go play on the gym equipment.
- Have one older daughter hold the baby.
- Have one older boy stay to watch the young ones play.
- Have one older boy come with you to shuttle food back.
- Smile when the table next to you, ooohs and ahhhs over your baby.
- Bring your trays in with 10 ketchup cups, 6 cups of water, 6 straws, and napkins all lined up like a nice OCD person would do. Sigh with satisfaction at the momentary thought that these ladies will think you have it all together by looking at your tray.
- Bring in the tray with the fish sandwhich, the two big macs, the 4 cheeseburgers, and the 7 small fries on it. (No drinks today, children…we are going econostyle!)
- Again smile when the table next to you chuckles when you call your children to eat….(“They all have numbers!”)
- Hear audible counting of your children.
- Enjoy the fact that your admirers really seem to think that it is wonderful that you have so many children.
- Decide to really do it up big and buy all your children dollar cones…splurge, I know!
- Head back to your van with the stray leftover fries, the unconsumed part of a cheeseburger, water cups still partially full, and very happy, satisfied children.
