Late last year, a friend of my daughter Marissa began to harass her, telling her horrible things and threatening to beat her up after school. One day she even went so far as to hit my daughter. The little girl had been a friend of my daughters and was a guest in our home church on more than one occasion, so this was very hard on Marissa.
So how do you deal with a bully situation in a godly manner that gives glory to the only living God?
1. Pray! Your first line of defense is always prayer. I prayed over the situation and all involved. Because she began having severe anxiety attacks, we also brought Marissa before the elders of the church and they prayed over her. The women of the church prayed for her. Our friends and family were all praying.
2. Contact the school or place where your child is being bullied. I went to school and spoke to the principal, the nurse, the teacher, and the guidance counselor. I told the principal that my goal wasn’t to attack this girl at school and have her labelled as a bully, instead I just wanted this behavior to stop and for my daughter (and other children) to feel, and be, safe.
3. Try to work things out with the parents. I called the mother of the other little girl and asked her to call me right away to discuss some issues our daughters were having. My call was returned the next night by two very angry parents who did everything from yelling and using foul language to picking on my daughter and her health. I stayed calm throughout the whole conversation and tried to end it as peaceably as possible. The next day I invited the mother out to breakfast at a diner (my treat) so we could discuss this issue, but she refused. So I shook the dust off my feet and moved on.
4. Get your child checked by experts. My daughter had loss some weight and had dark circles under her eyes. We took her to her pediatrician just to make sure she was ok health-wise. I also began giving her multi-vitamins, fish oil, and started healthier eating habits (which has really made a difference!)
5. Look for alternatives for school. My daughter’s stress and anxiety continued even after the principal resolved the bully issue at school. To top it off, Marissa’s also very afraid of throwing-up. So she would get stomach aches from her anxieties, then get all worked up because she was afraid of throwing-up. Marissa was more in the nurses office than in class and we decided that it was best to remove her from the environment that was stressing her out and homeschool her. The first week she was home, she slept the whole night, plus napped for over an hour in the afternoon and began eating like she was a starved child!
Throughout this process, we always covered Marissa in prayer and never showed any anger to the other little girl or her family. No matter how the other family treated us, we continued to treat them warmly. They know we are a Christian family and throughout the whole process we continued to try and show them the love of Christ. God is in control of everything and what the enemy meant for harm and destruction, God used for good!
We are now a homeschooling family and my daughter is surrounded by Christian homeschooling girls that have been truly a blessing over her spirit. If you ever experience a bully situation, cover the children in prayer and seek God’s will! He will provide a way – He always does!
Yasmin is married to her favorite man and the happy mommy of four children. As a new Christian and a more recent stay at home mom, Yasmin is excited about all that the Lord has in store for her as He teaches her how to be a Proverbs 31 woman. You can follow her journey at Growing P31 woman, as well as on Facebook and Twitter.